Friday, October 5, 2007

Bring Back The love of Your Life: How to Rekindle Lost Love



The first months of a relationship are one of the sweetest and the happiest. Attraction is still there as well as the anticipation and the excitement of being in love. But as soon as the bubble bursts and lovers fall back on earth, they will soon realize that what they have expected from the relationship is actually not there. When reality falls short of their ideals, that is when they will start to think if the relationship is the right one for them. But it’s always worth it to try to rekindle lost love.

This is what usually happens for people who have stayed so long in the relationship that they have started to make it a routine. The lack of excitement and newness can result to infidelities and even break-ups. For some couples, this can happen after just a few months while others can stay together for 10 years only to separate afterwards.

In order to not face this kind of dilemma, it is important that you also nurture the relationship and bring something new into it. That way boredom can be avoided. Here are some ideas on how to rekindle lost love and bring back the passion that has been missing for some time.

Take a vacation together
A vacation together will help couples to rekindle lost love. You will not believe the wonders that a vacation can do to a relationship, no matter how short or how simple it is. The relaxed atmosphere will allow lovers to take things in perspective and bring back the spice that have brought them together before. Of course the alone time, away from people and work also does not hurt in strengthening the intimacy. Do something for fun and romantic during your vacation to rekindle lost love. Laugh. Make out. Be teenagers once again.

Talk to each other
This does not mean that you should start those heavy talks that are guaranteed to scare away anyone. After all, who wants confrontational open forums where you will be pressured to say things that you do not really want to say?

What we mean by talk here is talking in the purest sense to rekindle lost love. Just chat about anything and everything. Talk about your childhood. Tell things that you have not revealed to anyone. Share stories and experiences. Oftentimes, during the course of your talk, the major issues in the relationship will come out. That's when you resolve things and rekindle lost love.

Introduce new things
Provide the spice in your relationship to rekindle lost love. Try out new things together. This will not only enrich your lives together but will also develop your individual selves. Doing something new will also supply the excitement that can beat the routine and the boredom. New experiences also tend to bond people together as it creates memories that will not be taken away.

As much as you can, make this a habit. Plan to do a new thing every anniversary or maybe even monthly. It will be good for couples trying to rekindle lost love.

Reminisce
Another way to rekindle lost love is to go back memory lane and reminisce of the things that you have gone through in the years or months that you have been together. Visit the restaurant where you had your first date or rent the DVD of the first movie that you've seen together. This will help bring back the memories and hopefully the love that you once felt for each other.

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Tuesday, October 2, 2007

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Saving Marriages With Unconditional Love

In the middle of a session the other day I had a powerful realization. I was asked to think of a relationship I had with something in the last week that in my mind was the ideal relationship, and to think of what it was about that relationship that made it ideal.
A number of men in the group thought of their cars, tool sheds, families, workmates, old friends, even relationships with objects such as their television remote, recliner chair, or favorite pair of shoes. To each of these men, these things felt comfortable, and simple. The relationships they had with these people or objects was rewarding and easy to maintain.
When my turn came to identify my ideal relationship, I thought of my dog. My dog has very simple needs, and it is the ultimate ego-boost for me when I get home at night and I am greeted in such an enthusiastic fashion. I don’t know of any others that greet me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been away from the house or no matter how my day has been. I call this unconditional love.
So what is unconditional love?
Unconditional love is the type of love that comes without conditions. It is the type of love that you have for your partner when the romantic, hollywood-style love is gone. Once the romantic love is gone you make the transition to "real" love. Real love is love you have for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect. You know your partner has faults. You know your partner is not perfect. You know your partner makes mistakes sometimes, but that’s okay. You still love them. This is unconditional love.
The same thing applies to you however in looking at your partner’s faults. You acknowledge that you are the same. You have faults. You are not perfect. You know you make mistakes sometimes, but that’s okay. That’s called self-acceptance, and you expect unconditional love to overcome the faults and imperfections that people have.
So what do you get from this then? Should we all go out and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Maybe there is a lesson to be learned here. We all clutter our lives with trials and tribulations, and there is the temptation to let our issues rule our lives.
But if you are serious about saving your marriage you need to put the clutter to one side and let your unconditional love come through. It is okay to have faults and make mistakes. And love will conquer them all.
Have a think about unconditional love and how you can apply this realization to your relationship.
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